Sitting on Cats


Thursday and Friday: The task

So for anyone who has not met me before I am not a great lover of animals. Far from being an enemy to the generally fluffy characters, I would prefer to make it known that I am mildly indifferent to their qualities, their distinctions. It is, however, fair to say that I am never more happy than when I am pottering along my own way as they tootle along theirs.

Who better then to cat-sit for 4 days than me? (Well everyone possibly).

Despite this oversight I have managed to secure an added responsibility for the long weekend that involves feeding, watering and cleaning up after two rather large house cats: Pogo and Stella. Not only that, but I fear I am expected to show some sort of affection towards these lounging creatures at each visit. Gloves anyone?

Pogo and Stella (front to back)

So as Saturday quickly approaches I am excited about my latest challenge but then again I am also scared that something might go wrong. I picture cats fleeing out of the building, scurrying down 2nd Avenue only to be squished flat by a large waste lorry (they come huge and imposing in these parts). Since my mission was accepted I have been worrying that the calculating cats will successfully prize open the 4th floor windows and after scaling down the fire escape, scurry down 2nd Avenue and again meet their fate (they were lucky to survive the first ordeal it seems). Or perhaps, I imagine, one of the cats knocks over the television, smashing it into small but manageable sharp skewers and then in a sort of death pact, ON MY WATCH, swallow a few and choke slowly creating huge amounts of messy cat parts in a final punishing effort to document their suffering and flag up any neglect they may have felt. Believe me the list of doom does not stop there. But possibly after the last comment maybe I should.

I shall no doubt have sleepless nights and wake less nightmares. Dreading the break of dawn each day as I must enter the cats’ residence to find them in distress or to not find them at all.

Plotting an escape? Don’t even think about it Stella!

Saturday: Day 1 of Mission Animal Welfare

Well so far disasters averted I have learnt only that cats poop A LOT. In fact I know I mentioned that these cats were larger than the average, wily street cat (the above image may suggest why this is the case), but I still feel that the level of poopage in the litter facility is excessive. When taking into account how little they seem to eat (I did not need to really fill their bowls) it is quite outstanding. But as I should have probably realised earlier on in this sentence, there is a time and place for discussions on bowel movements. I shall restrain myself from now on. Sorry.

Other than the above I found the task relatively pain free. I gave the pair a little stroke and supplied them with fresh reserves and carried on my merry way (another walking tour with another visitor. Ay ay ay. No rest for the wicked eh!?)

Sunday, Monday and Tuesday: Loving the cats?

Novelty has worn off now. Cats poop and shed fluff. Neither of which I like much. However, they have been fed and watered and really now the task is over I do think when I browse the photographs of Stell and Pog (we are on nickname terms now) how could I resist these little faces?

Yeah OK. You’re cute. But you know it.


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